Present is Present

It's almost 21:00; Tomorrow at 14:00, I have Semister exam. As usual, I haven't studied anything, yet. But I am still confident that, I will.

At this very moment, I am thinking, how did this happen? I mean, I had so much time. Alarm rang; It reminded me about one of my friend's birthday. I took my guitar, sung 'Happy birthday', recorded it; So that I can send him at exact 00:00. But, I have to calculate- when exactly to press 'send' button(?) I want mine to be the first wish. Ok, file size is about 3MB; Based on my Internet connection and uploading speed, it takes at least 4 minutes(3G but, yeah). So, I have to press send button at 23:56. "Ok Google, remind me to wish my friend at 11 56". "Ok, do you want to save this?"; "Yes."

I heard my recording twice to make sure it's good enough to send. Heard it one more time to appreciate myself. And yet, I tried another attempt just to see whether I can do any better. Heard new one twice but I decided to stick with first attempt. Scrolled down to see SO many recordings which I had almost forgot. Stuck my headphones in my ear and played a random recording. Suddenly I realized, tomorrow exam! Surprisingly, it was just 21:20. "Ohh cool, let me hear this one and study later :)". And when I glanced at time few minutes later, it was 22:00. "Shit!!"; I took my pen and started planning what to study(?) But deep inside, I was not happy about that calculation I made about the time 'when' I should click 'send' button. "Ohhh, yeah, I didn't consider his downloading time! How can I forget that?? Sheeet!"; So, I know he got 3G; It takes 10-15 seconds to download. So, my planning is okay but a minute earlier than before. Changed reminder manually. "But, this is exam time; What if he turned off his cell phone/Data(?). Wait, let me text him now and see." 

"Damn, he is offline; Wait, let me call him and ask for study suggestion and to come online, too".

Ring.. Ring..
"Hello.."

"En madakattile?"

"Odakattin le; Barobbari haryakatteti subject!";

"Uhhmmmm.. okay. Yav yav chapter odakatti?";

"1,2,4,7,8";

"3,5,6?"

"Av doddv adav. Nee yav odakatti?";
"Uhh, naanu 1,2,4,7,8!";

"Ohh okay..";

"Important question yavara list out maadi?";

"Hu le, 1st chapter, 2nd chapter matt 8th valag predictable adav.";

"Nang questions kalas avann what's app naag";

"Barko le pa; Nannkade net illa";

What the fuck!

"Okay hel pa;";

----

--

-

"So, ivasht important?"

"Haa, ivv baru chance aiti naale.. nee en, eeg odak kunti en? haha";

"uhhh.. hu le pa";

"Gottait togopa; Hinga andd andd score madtiri.";

"Yappa elli score o maraya! Anyway, advance happy birthday le";

"Ae thanks le. Nenap ittiyapa exam time naagu?";

I hated my cellphone for reminding me. "Hu le; aat tago pa.. od; Naale bhetti aaguna";

"Okay le, Bye";
"Bye.";

__________________________________________________________________________

This happened exactly 11 years ago. In binary.

I don't know where he is now. I found those recordings today. This time, I liked second attempt!

Now, I know how that happened; I spent time thinking about How I spent time.

Now, I am gonna start this article with the word now. Oh, I already did. Anyway, now that I am 3 years in the future than the time when I was student, what I would like to say to my past self if I ever get to meet him?

First thing, "You are stupid. Period";
Second, "You waste too much time thinking shit!"
"You never thought about circumstances. You act blindly. You are such a boring person."

He replied!
"Okay. May be you are smarter than me. I agree that I do think shitty things which are no longer useful for you now. I do act blindly sometimes because, as you said, I am stupid comparing to you now. But hey, you are what you are because I AM. All those shitty thoughts made you what you are today. If you think you are smarter than me, that is because of those exact shitty thoughts which you think they don't matter to you. But at subconscious level they defined you. This is one of shitty thought once. It makes perfect sense to you now. Isn't that right? There is no you without me. Yes, of course, I did mistakes but I did some really good things too. Appreciate them. And about mistakes, correct them now if you can. You can't blame me for what I was. Because, you are result of me. I defined you"

Me:
"Okay, I had forgotten that you were egoistic. But you are right. Do you remember once you wrote 'Present is indeed present' and tried to make sense of it but it went hard? Guess what, I haven't figured it out yet. May be, that is why I am still thinking about you"

You might have a million doller idea. But it worths nothing if you don't live right now.